When Your Money Gets Heavy: Turning Wealth Anxiety Into Confidence

The Emotional Weight of Wealth: Managing Financial Anxiety and Complexity

In this episode of the Retire Early Retire Now podcast, certified financial planner Hunter Kelly explores a less-discussed aspect of wealth management: the emotional burden that accompanies financial success. Discussing common myths, Hunter explains why increased wealth often leads to more complex financial decisions and heightened anxiety. He outlines the typical reactions people have when wealth feels heavy—freezing, following the crowd, and over-optimizing—and describes how his Palm Valley Pathway process can transform these feelings of overwhelm into clarity, confidence, and direction. By understanding one's current financial state, implementing strategic planning, and executing a clear roadmap, listeners can move from financial anxiety to empowerment. The episode emphasizes the importance of having a thoughtful and adaptable financial plan and offers actionable advice for those seeking to manage their wealth effectively.

00:00 Welcome to the Retire Early Retire Now Podcast
00:16 The Emotional Weight of Wealth
01:15 Why Wealth Brings Complexity
04:43 Common Reactions to Financial Stress
08:44 What People Really Want: Clarity, Confidence, and Direction
11:23 The Palm Valley Pathway: A Step-by-Step Guide
17:16 Conclusion and How to Get Help

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Transcript

0:00

And welcome back to the Retire Early Retire Now podcast. I'm your host, hunter Kelly, certified financial planner and founder of Palm Valley Wealth Management, where we help high income earning families, build clarity, confidence, and direction in their financial lives so that they can actually enjoy the wealth they've worked so hard to build. and today we're talking about something that most financial podcasts don't talk about. Not budgeting, not investments, not stock market predictions. We're talking about the emotional weight of wealth because here is what I see over and over again in my practice. Most people who come to work with us. They aren't struggling financially, they're not broke, they're not clueless. They're actually doing relatively well. They built, they have built great income, a great career. They have families. They've saved. They've invested, they make really smart financial decisions, but then something changes. They reach a point in their wealth where money gets. Heavy. Suddenly every financial decision feels bigger. The mistakes feel riskier. The room for error feels more narrow, and the thought that keeps creeping in is I really do not want to mess this up. If that resonates with you, this episode is going to feel like I'm sitting across the table from you. So let's jump in. Let's start with why this even happens because most people think once I make more money, this will all get easier. But you and I both know that's not how this works. Shoot, even in my. My situation, my own personal life, I, I think all the time, hey, if I just get more clients, make more money for the business, make more money personally, life will get simpler. And as I make more money as my business grows, that is further from the truth that couldn't be further from the truth. And so this myth says, As your income goes up or as your accounts grow, life will get simpler. What actually happens is as your wealth grows, complexity grows, your taxes get more complex, your investments get more complex, and so. or this is or what clients have expressed to me why they come work with me. Right? When they had the first 10 to$20,000 invested, market swings were at best. Interesting. They didn't notice them. They didn't necessarily pay attention. But now that they have 500,000, a million, 3 million, those market swings are very noticeable and. Most of the time they make people emotional. Right? A 10% drop is no longer just a number on the screen. It's college tuition. It's earlier retirement. It's travel, it's financial independence. And so it feels like you are seeing your future bounce around on a chart, Taxes stop being annoying, and they become expensive earlier in life. Taxes again. Annoying, right? You're making less money. It's just something you have to pay. And now they're expensive. They're six figure checks. They're huge missed planning opportunities, decisions that have real long-term consequences. And if you're new to this podcast, I talk about this all the time, but taxes are going to be the biggest expense over your lifetime. And so as you make more income, that is going to get more complex and you need to have strategies to mitigate that because that's gonna be a big determiner on how well you can build wealth or how efficiently you can build wealth. Right? If you're doing all the other things like saving and not spending too much and investing, uh, tax can be a game changer on. Building that wealth, not only monetarily, but uh, in your social and personal life, your spon responsibilities increase. So you're no longer just responsible for yourself like you were maybe in your twenties. Now you have a spouse, you have kids, you, maybe you have aging parents. You career is more demanding. If you own a business, maybe you have employees. So wealth shifts from freedom to stewardship. That creates weight. You are responsible for these other people, right? as fulfilling as that may be. That is an added stress and High achievers get where they are by making quick decisions, trusting themselves and taking action. but at some point, once the wealth grows, that same brain slows down. Don't screw this up. that's what I call the wealth gravity point where success makes decisions heavier, then easier and for most families, that's the exact point where they start thinking about hiring someone like us. So now. That we understand why money suddenly feels heavier. Let's talk about how people usually react when they hit this stage because almost everyone falls into three categories or at, this is what I've recognized in my practice. When money starts to feel heavy, people typically respond in one of three ways. if you're still listening, you're probably going to recognize yourself at, in at least one of these. I call this the freezer. This person is intelligent. They know decisions matter. They know they should be planning, but fear quietly wins. So they hold on to too much cash. They delay decisions. They procrastinate tax planning. They avoid reviewing their accounts. They say, I'll get to it. I want to think more about it. I'll do this when things slow down, but the truth is things will not slow down. You don't need to think more about it, and you'll never get to it. Inaction is a decision and it's usually one of the most expensive ones. Inflation needs to away at your cash tax planning opportunities pass. Retirement gets delayed. Stress builds instead of shrinking. The next category is the crowd follower. This person doesn't freeze. They react, they bounce between TikTok advice, CNBC, panic, click big headlines. Coworkers investment ideas. My buddy said, this fund is amazing. They end up with random investment accounts, disjointed products, no actual strategies, whether it's taxes or investment. no alignment into goals, Not because they're ignorant, but because when you're unsure, you latch to the loudest most confident voice. The problem those people don't know. Your taxes, your income, your family, your goals, your timeline. So they build a collection of decisions, not a plan. And this one is probably the most common. people compare themselves to their neighbors, their friends, coworkers, and they get the 30,000 foot view, or they, in my opinion, they get the Instagram view, all the good things that are happening, but nothing behind the scene. Right? And so they don't have enough information to make good. Direct decisions that will coordinate into a plan, that will work best for them, right? The last category is the over optimizer paralysis, by analysis. This is the spreadsheet warrior. They research endlessly. They compare. They read everything. They analyze every opinion. They desperately look for the perfect financial plan, and that doesn't exist. The goal isn't perfection. The goal is a thoughtful, intentional plan that you can stick with, that can change over time. Because one of the best things I ever heard from a financial planner is that the day that you make that financial plan the next day, it is incorrect. It is a living, working document, right? We're gonna make the best decisions every day that we can to get as closest to our goals, but things change, right? If we never, if we made a financial plan and never looked at it again for 20 years. Odds are that a financial plan is wrong, And so this should be a living, breathing document or living breathing plan that you can make changes to. And so the goal is not to be perfect, is to be thoughtful and have an attentional plan to stick with. perfection focused. Yeah, people rarely execute consistently. I have friends like this, one specifically comes into mind and we, we always say, Hey, does that fit into your Google spreadsheet and this and that, right? we all have that friend that's super analytical. Uh, but again, I find that some of these people get that paralysis by analysis and they never end up making the correct decisions because they, they're overwhelmed with data. so if those are the common reactions, what do people really want when they reach this point? Let's talk about it. when people reach out to my firm, Palm Valley, they almost never say, I want the highest house of return. I want some fancy investment product. Yes, every now and then, someone will say that, and I generally turn them away because. I'm never gonna be able to guarantee a X amount of percent or anything like that. And if any advisor does, you should run for the hills, They say things like, I just wanna know. I'm not screwing this up. I just want to simplify my life. I need someone to make sense of all of this. I want to feel confident in the decisions that I'm making. And at the core, people are searching for three things. Clarity, confidence, and direction. So clarity. Where are we really? what do we truly own? What do we truly owe? how do all of these accounts put together? When can I actually retire? Is that a feasible number? Anxiety thrives in confusion. Clarity alone lowers anxiety dramatically. this is so true. Every time that we do one of these get organized meetings, and we start building out the plan. Most people realize, especially successful people realize, Hey, it's not that bad. There's some things that we can do better. And now we have a sense of organization clarity. I know where we're at and where we want to go, things of that nature. but things typically are never as bad as people think. and once they have that grasp of where they are and kind of where, where they are and where they want to go, you can kind of see that anxiety start to, to fall away, especially after a few meetings and things of that nature. And so the next thing is confidence. They, they want to be able to say, yes, we're doing the right things. Yes, this strategy makes sense for my situation. Yes, we're on track. Confidence is one of the greatest financial outcomes. That's exactly, and people want peace of mind. They want confidence knowing that, hey, the, the amount that I'm saving, the things that I've been doing. It all makes sense and I'm doing the right things. And a financial advisor can do that, right? the last thing, direction. People don't want random advice. they want to know. What should I be doing right now? What truly matters first, what's gonna move the needle most? What can wait and what is the smartest move next? And that's exactly why we build our planning process. So let's talk about how we help families move from overwhelmed to organized, from fearful to confident, from heavy to hopeful, and that's where the Palm Valley pathway comes in. Again, I talked a little bit about this last episode, but the Palm Valley pathway, uh, is something that I've built, I've worked with clients for, just about 10 years now, and it's a, a. Process that I have developed that I feel that is the best way to help clients gain that clarity, gain organization, gain confidence and gain direction. So let's walk through. This in real life language. The first step is exploration. This is where we wanna sit down and talk, not about stock tickers or products, but about life, career, kids, stress, fears, dreams, purpose. What do you actually want to get out of this potential relationship? What are some things that have to happen over the next year, two years, five years, to make your. Decision, potentially hiring somebody or make sure that the things that you're doing financially makes sense, right? Uh, that was a great decision that we hired Hunter, because money is not the point. Money is a tool. I talk about this all the time. You should have purpose in life and that purpose shouldn't just be making more money. That purpose should be doing things that you enjoy with the people that you enjoy, right? Uh, mine, personally, I want to do things outside with my family and friends, the people that I love more and more and more.'cause I love being outside, right? Clients often tell me, this is the first time someone's actually asked about our life and not just our assets. so once we get through that first exploration phase. We understand, Hey, this is where we want to be. This is our point B, right? Then we get organized. We get, and we understand where point A is. We bring in order into this chaos. We figure out. Where everything is, what's invested, where, what's working, what's not, what the risks are, what the opportunities are. Just organizing creates relief. Like I said, once we go through this step, people realize, Hey, it's not as bad as I thought it was. And you can see the anxiety go away. Most people feel stressed, not because their financials are bad, but because they had no clue where they were at. So just getting some clarity. Step three, optimize. This is where the planning, the strategy happens. we start building a plan intentionally around investments, tax planning, asset allocation, cash flow, retirement projections, risk management, all based on. Really what's important to the client, right? And so these are all things that you can do at home if you're not interested in hiring an advisor. again, not everybody wants to or needs to hire an advisor, but these are things that you can do. And so if you have. Hey, I know where I want to be somewhere in the future. I know what's important to me, whether that's your career, your kids, your, retirement, whatever that may be. you have an idea of what's important to you. Most people know that, whether they've sat down and thought about that for and put it into words or wrote it down. Most people have an idea of what that is, and then get organized. Right? We talked about a little bit about this last week. Understand where you're at, where is that point A so that we can start to build a bridge to point B, and that's where optimize comes in, right? Start planning around those things. And as you build that financial plan, you start talking about those investments and taxes and, and all those nerdy financial planning things. You have that lens of where is my point be? Where is, where is the guiding light on? Why am I making this, these, these decisions, what decisions need to be made to get to point B? This is, uh, the difference between, I think we're okay to, I know we're okay. Where I know where we're headed. And then step forward is to take that planning, put it into a real roadmap, create clear steps, clear milestones, clear. Execution and structure. It's not theory, it's direction. So just writing this down, right, and this is what we do at Palm Valley Wealth Management. We create a one page financial plan so that you know exactly what you should be doing, when you should be doing it, why you should be doing it. Um, and this is something that you should do as well. If you're not working with an advisor, have it written down so that you can go back and review it. And, and measure, Hey, how well am I doing this last month, this last quarter, this last year? Uh, and what are some changes that I need to make in the future? And then last step would be action, right? because nothing matters unless it's executed. And this is where, the, the magic sauce is made holding clients accountable to make sure that they do the things that they need to do. Here's what we're doing, here's why we're doing it, and here's the impact of doing those decisions, right then. There's no fear. Fear loses its power. and now you can start making headway from point A to point B. Clients don't say, wow, that's a cool investment product. They say, I finally feel like I can breathe. I feel lighter. I feel in control. They feel like they know where they're at. They have that clarity, right? And so if you've been listening and thinking, okay, it's, he's definitely talking about me. Let's land the plane. If, if you are at a point where your investment's still heavier, your taxes feel more serious, decisions feel bigger, and you're thinking, I do not want to mess things up. You're not alone. This is a common theme that I see in my practice all the time. You don't have to carry that weight yourself. That is exactly what we do at Palm Valley Wealth Management. We help high income earning families, create clarity, confidence, and direction. So money stops feeling heavy. It starts filling, empowering again. And if you want to walk through your situation, if you want to see whether you're on track or, or if you just want a second opinion. Go to my website, palm valley wwm.com and Click on the Palm Valley Pathway button. You can schedule a call with me. Would love to have a conversation with you and see where I can help. you've built the wealth and now let's just make sure it works for you. If you enjoyed this episode, please take a second, leave a five star review on your favorite podcast and app. It helps more families find this show. thanks for listening to the podcast. I'm Hunter Kelly. See you next time. This podcast is for educational purposes only. It does not meant to be financial or investment advice. Please do not make decisions solely based on this podcast alone. Please seek professional help when making decisions.